Ladies, what’s the point of asking a man questions about questionable behavior when the negatives will invariably be swept under the rug. Instead of interrogating your fella, boomerang that grand inquisition. Based on what you know of him and how fond you are of him, ask yourself, “Do I care?”
Women ask men ridiculous questions that beg for lies as answers to see if the man cares enough to lie to her. “Who was that woman?” “Where were you last night?” “Why is your baby’s momma textin you at 3am?”
We rake over every letter of the evidence with our girls and bounce the bogus excuses off of them so that they’ll stroke our egos, confirm that the explanation is plausible. The likelihood of his far-flung veggie tale being true is as astronomical as hitting the lotto, but you want to believe, have to believe. Need to believe! What’s worse, you implore your friends to believe his story too! They even come up with ridiculous stories to cover his ass before you confront him, you know, while he’s cookin up his excuse.
And…for what? Why do we even confront men with the 48hrs. Hard Evidence that would have him convicted by any jury in the land? Why? We ask to proclaim a sense of bad-assed-ness. We ask because when our girls are outraged at seeing him hugged-up on some strange woman, the naked pictures in his phone, when we find a pair of too large/ too small panties out of the drier, we can appear mighty when we say, “Oh yea, I called his ass out on that one” Why ask if he has to tell you a lie that conveniently contradicts all probablility that he slipped up?
You already know he’ll lie. Ask yourself, instead, “Do I know this man?” When he plays his rendition of the damning events, you’re simply taking what you know of him and what you want to believe of him and reconstructing your own truth based on his testimony.Why even ask? Have the foresight to see whether you will or will not leave him and when your bags are packed, then and only then, should you inform him that you know of his misdeeds.
If you hinge your staying or leaving on the minutia, you’re simply begging him to lie to you. If his explanation will keep you, you didn’t want to go in the first place. So why entertain the drama. If you find evidence, and you don’t want to leave, say, “I trust my man,” and leave it at that. Odds are some impossible thing happened right when you read the text, so-and-so snapped the picture, his voice got recorded…whatever! Why drive yourself crazy and make yourself appear gullible to him?
